Twenty-third Sunday in Ordinary Time
A priest friend of mine sent me this story a few years back. It is the story of one of his friends who is a cab driver who often did night shifts to make just a little more money.
One day, at 2:30 in the morning, the cab driver was called to an apartment. When he got there, he saw no one except a single dim light at the entrance. Normally, in such circumstances cab drivers normally honk once or twice and if they see no one within a minute, they drive away, not willing to take a risk to go in.
On that day, this cab driver decided to go and knock at the door. He heard a frail voice mumble something. A minute later the door opened, and an elderly woman stood at the door with one small bag. From the look of the apartment, it seemed she lived there alone. From the entrance, the cab driver could not see anything much except for a neatly packed cardboard box, probably containing her belongings. The furniture was all covered as if no one had used them for some time. The man offered to help her with the bag and offering his other hand he slowly walked her to the car. She thanked him for being so kind. He replied that he would have done the same thing for his mother. She gave him the address and asked if he could drive to the address through downtown. The cab driver said that there was a shorter route rather than going through downtown. She insisted driving through downtown. She said she had plenty of time as she was on her way to the hospice. She did not have much longer to live. She had no family, and she wanted to drive through downtown because she wanted to pass by the place where her husband and her had lived briefly after they married. The man’s heart sank as he heard her story.
They reached their destination - a small hospice. Someone received this woman at the door with a wheel chair. The woman looked at the cab driver with gratitude in her eyes. He did not charge her for the ride. He merely bent down and gave her a hug. She held him tightly and said, “You gave an old woman a little moment of joy. Thank you.” As the door to the hospice shut the cab driver felt that a door to life had been shut.
The cab driver did not pick any more passengers that day. But the cab driver ends the story, saying: “For the remainder of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away? What if I had been in a foul mood and had refused to engage the woman in conversation? How many other moments like that had I missed or failed to grasp?”
My priest friend who sent me the story ended by saying, “People may not remember exactly what you did, or what you said. But they will always remember how you made them feel.”
In today’s second reading Paul says to the Romans, “Owe nothing to anyone, except to love one another” (Rom 13:8). I have asked myself many times this week, “What does this mean?” Basing myself on the example of the cab driver and on the example Jesus sets for us, I offer three thoughts:
Love is an Attitude
Love is not just a feeling. it is not just about wishful thinking. It is an attitude, a kind of basic instinct. It is that first thought that comes to mind when I see someone or encounter a situation. If the first thought that emerges is goodness, kindness, and gentleness; if my basic instinct is to care, to serve, to help, to build-up, to encourage, to make things better, that is love. When Paul says, “Owe nothing to anyone, except to love one another,” I think he means that our instinctive response to any one and any situation is healthy, good, positive, selfless, sacrificial, and helpful.
Love is Honesty
I am sure we have lived life enough to know that not every one around us acts in love. For such situations, Jesus seems to give us a strategy to deal with those who err - speaking to the erring person directly before taking any further steps. I am not sure if this is applicable in every situation, but it is a strategy.
I believe that the core principle at play in Jesus’ strategy is honesty. For me, honesty in relationships means the following:
- That I practice in my own life what I try to correct in others.
- That I do not say things behind a person that I would not say in their presence.
- That I am open to correction when others correct me.
- That I am both willing and open to forgiveness, reconciliation, and healing.
Love is a Commitment
After all we have said and done, despite our best attitude, love may not always be reciprocated with love. The chance that we will encounter negativity in the form of abuse, betrayal, hate, inequality, racism, and injustice, is real. In such circumstances “Owe nothing except to love one another” means that we do not allow other people’s behaviour to alter our capacity for love. Love is a commitment. Even when we find ourselves in loveless situations, we stay committed to love.
The Eucharist is a Sacrament of love. As we participate in this Eucharist, may we “Owe nothing to anyone, except to love one another.” For as Paul says, "Love is the fulfillment of the law" (Rom 8:10).
- Fr. Satish Joseph