Twenty-third Sunday in Ordinary Time
Life is a web of relationships. Relationships are life-giving, but they can also suck the life out of us. Relationships can make life easy, but we can also find ourselves entangled in this complex web. Think, for example, about how marriage creates a whole new network of relationships. On the reverse think about how a divorce throws but an entire network of relationships into chaos. Or think about the pandemic, and the way in which it has reprogramed us to manage our relationships. Some families have found the pandemic to be a time for great bonding. However, the steep increase in domestic violence and unintended pregnancies tell us that there is another side to the story. Or, think about our present political and social climate. If you have not found your relationship with a family member or long-time friend under tremendous stress, then thank God, because you are an exception.
To the already complex web of relationships, today’s scripture readings add yet another dimension – the church, or relationships within the community of believers. Jesus institutes a four-step process to deal with those we might have a conflict within the community of believers. Often, today gospel passage is read as a solution to deal with difficult interpersonal relationship. Whereas, it can be useful for that purpose, Matthew’s original purpose was to deal provide a step-by-step guide to deal with an erring community member. This is also the context of Jesus’ saying, “Where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there in the midst of them.” In fact, Matthew was not referring so much to liturgical gatherings or prayer as much as he was referring to the quality of relationships within the Christian community. Whenever two or three gather together in Christ’s name, it must look like a gathering where Christ is present.
Let us allow today’s scripture readings to speak to our web of relationships. Here are my three points for today.
- The Ideal Web of Relationships. Let us begin with the ideal. As Christians, the ideal is very simple – that every believer conducts his or her affairs with such integrity that when two or three people gather in Christ’s name, it indeed looks like a gathering of believers. Often, reality is far from the ideal. Even Jesus struggled with the community of the Twelve. As close as they were to Jesus, they contested to be the first and the greatest in the kingdom of God. In all of scripture, we have but one instance of the ideal community. Luke gives us a glimpse in such a community in the Acts of the Apostles, where the community of believers as of one heart and mind. And then like a mirage, that scene disappears. However, the ideal is always in our vision. What is the ideal? The ideal is Jesus’ vision for his community of disciples. Before he made the ultimate self-sacrifice for the salvation of the world, he said this to his disciples in his farewell discourse, “This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (Mt 13:35). Thus, he told his disciples, “I give you a new commandment: love one another. As I have loved you, so should you love one another” (Jn 13:34). This is the ideal. Yes, relationships are hard, but Jesus shows us the way.
- Ideal versus the Reality. The Matthean community had the ideal that Jesus presented in its consciousness. But it also had to face the reality of managing intra-community relationships, especially when believers did not live up to the ideal. We ourselves face this reality in our families and at our workplace. The question is simple. What does a community do when members do not live up to the ideal? What we do when there are conflicts within the community. What do we when someone goes astray What does the community do when conflict affects the web of intra-community relationships? Matthew’s answer begins with the ideal. In the verses just before the passage we read today, we have the story of the lost sheep. Jesus asks this question, “What is your opinion? If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them goes astray, will he not leave the ninety-nine in the hills and go in search of the stray? In just the same way, it is not the will of your heavenly Father that one of these little ones be lost” (Mt 18:12-14). In other words, the ideal is that those who go astray are reconciled and intra-community conflicts are resolved amicably. Sometimes it may not be as straightforward. For this, Matthew institutes a four-step process. It is a judicial process. However, notice that it is carried out with much love. In other words, conflict resolution can be an act of love, concern, and tenderness. Unfortunately, these days many of us go straight directly to the fourth step – alienation, maligning, insulting, rejecting, hating, destroying, and even killing of those we get into conflict with. As believers, we must act differently. The Christian way is radically different. The Christian way is Jesus’ way.
- Owe Nothing, Except to Love One Another. Life is a web of relationships. The web of relationships is complex. In today’s second reading Paul gives us an ethic to manage our complex web of relationships. The rule is simple. Paul says, “Brothers and sisters: Owe nothing to anyone, except to love one another” (Rom 13:8). In fact, if we add the verse before, it says, “Pay to all their dues, taxes to whom taxes are due, toll to whom tolls are due, respect to whom respect is due, honor to whom honor is due” (Rom 13:7). And then he continues, “Owe nothing to anyone, except to love one another” (Rom 13:8). Furthermore, Paul says, “Love does no evil to the neighbor, hence, love is the fulfillment of the law” (Rom 13:10). In our very toxic political, social, and ecclesial environment, conflicts arise very easily. We can often find ourselves entangled in the web of complex relationships. As Christians and believers, though, no matter what our differences, no matter what we believe, no matter what side we take, no matter what is gained or lost, there is one thing in which we cannot be found wanting - that we “owe nothing to anyone except to love one another!” All “the commandments, Paul says, “You shall not commit adultery; you shall not kill; you shall not steal; you shall not covet, ” and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this saying, namely, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself” (Rom 13:9). This is the ultimate Christian ethic. May we never be found wanting in living it.
Let us bring our complex web of relationships, our families, our church, our nation and the world before this altar. This Eucharist has the power to transform. May our participation in this Eucharist transform our world into a place where we “owe nothing to anyone, except to love one another.”
- Fr. Satish Joseph