Feast of St. John, Apostle and Evangelist
Growing up unchurched and trying to figure out the Bible on my own (perhaps not the best plan), I was super envious of the people who knew Jesus when he was alive. That includes the disciples, of course, but goes well beyond them to anyone who knew him at the time.
At the root of my envy is the fact, mentioned in the Gospel reading for today, that these folks actually saw Jesus. More than that, they heard what he had to say and knew when and where he said it. They could think about the context in which Jesus was speaking and to whom. They could ask him questions if they didn’t understand a parable or some other teaching Jesus had offered. And, of course, just being in his presence would have been incredible, and well beyond my power to imagine.
But such is not my luck. I will never see Jesus in this world, I don’t think. I suppose he could return during my lifetime, but that seems unlikely. I have to figure out how to live not having seen.
So, how am I (21st-century person that I am) to think about Christian faith? If I can’t know for sure that Jesus is the Son of God, then can I really believe? Can I really be a Christian?
Lots of folks have wrestled with this question over time. One particularly creative answer goes like this: since there’s no way to know for certain that Jesus is the Messiah and since God (if God exists) makes the final call (heaven or hell for you for eternity), then you’re probably best off believing. You know, just to be safe.
Now there’s a neat and tidy argument. And I do see the logic in it. But where’s the faith in it? No leap required? Can we call something faith when all it demands of us is that we accept certain “logical” arguments? When all it demands of us is that we “play the odds”?
I love the scene before us today. There’s a lot of activity. People are going this way and that. Running here and there. All trying to get to the tomb. All want to see. Is Jesus in there? What’s in there? What happened to Jesus’s body? Where are his garments?
So many questions! And it seems that the more his followers see, the more questions they have. What happened here? No one knows. What does it all mean?
As I think about this scene, I imagine Jesus standing at a distance watching his followers run to and fro, throwing out questions, scratching their heads. What happened? Where is Jesus? What does it all mean?
And Jesus’s reply: “Exactly. Now you’re starting to get it.”
—Susan Trollinger