Tuesday of the Twenty-first Week in Ordinary Time
When was the last time an authority figure said something like “explain yourself” to you? It can well up anxiety, quick thinking, and perhaps even the temptation to spin a lie. Or it can be an opportunity for teaching or reviewing the truth. We all want the truth, but we don’t want to get in trouble for it; rather we want to be believed and understood. I wonder if Jesus and Moses felt this way when the taught the people the Law, parables, and new commandments. They were each laying out a radical new way of life for their followers. They each really want the people to ‘get it.’ But even those immediate followers often seem to fail at understanding; is it any wonder we get confused as well?
The humor of today’s Gospel is that the disciples want an explanation for Jesus’s parable- the same parable that requires they explain themselves to God. We also must one day go before the throne of grace and explain ourselves. Why do we live the way that we live? What values to we base our decisions on? How do we know whether or not we are good seed or bad seed? With so much scandal in church, nonprofit, business, and public institutions, can we be sure we are following good teaching and advice, or might we be hoodwinked into following a devil? There are no easy answers to these questions. It’s a matter for contemplative and communal prayer; the answer lies more in the mystical heart of love than the theological head of truth.
Thankfully, we have in today’s Psalm a reminder of God’s heart. The Lord is kind. The Lord is merciful. This much we can be sure of: God does not deal with us as harshly as we deserve. We are the benefactors of Jesus’s Mercy. We suffer here on Earth the effects of our own sins and the sins of others, but we also enjoy the mercy of God that puts us back into right relationship with God. Have you failed to understand God? Almost certainly you have. So let’s approach the Lord and explain ourselves with humility, with ‘fear’ or awe, knowing that the mystery of God is beyond our understanding. As a parent I know something about the love a father has for his sons, but that doesn’t mean I can predict how God will love and deal with me. I can only trust in God’s Mercy and Kindness. May we trust God’s heart and rely more on that than our own understanding.
-Chris Nieport