Monday of the Twenty-sixth Sunday in Ordinary Time
I'm not sure if you noticed but a lot more can happen on social media than cute cat photos and silly memes. It can be a pretty hostile place. And that hostility can be supercharged because the entire nature of our communication on social media is performative. Our "in" crowd is on there and watching and we, consciously or unconsciously, are longing for their approval when we engage on social media. Part of me wants to chalk all of this up to being social media's problem. But it isn't. I concede the rules of the game have changed DRAMATICALLY because of social media's permanence, scope, performative nature, and propensity to fuel misinformation and conflict. However, a puddle of gas, no matter how great its potential for explosion, will remain inert until the spark is brought near it. Today's Gospel is a good reminder that we are carrying that spark.
We see two exchanges in today's Gospel that speak to me of that catalyst that can cause damage to relationships. The first is the bickering of the Apostles about who is the greatest. The human spirit's drive to excel and succeed is a marvelous part of our character, but in our fallenness, we are so quick to make our success about the failure of others, and maybe more importantly, we fear others' successes as being portents of our own failings. Seeing another's joy should invigorate us, but it doesn't always. Sometimes it leads to a desire to one-up the other and at other times it puts us in a funk. The comparison game that we play with others can be benign at times, but it can plant seeds that grow into pernicious weeds. People can second guess themselves and the informed decisions they are making because of how someone's post makes them feel. Individuals can be left feeling insecure and inadequate. Judgments about how people prioritize their time and money can negatively impact our opinions of them. When we begin to see joy, happiness, success, and love as limited commodities that if others have them, there won't be enough for me, then we fall into the kind of bickering the Apostles did.
The second exchange is John's policing of the other individual. You can hear the performative side of John's statement. It is almost like he is saying, "Don't worry Jesus, we took care of it for you. We've got your back." What we witness here is the same thing that seems to fuel so many disputes. Whenever I'm tempted to participate in disagreements on social media they are not often with people with whom I disagree severely. Rather, it is with those people with whom I disagree by a matter of degrees. We hold much in common but our means differ, or our mode of expressing ourselves, or the way we prioritize, or any of those things differs. It is not that I disagree with them, but that I want them to sound more like me (or at least how I imagine myself sounding). I'm more likely to debate atonement with an Evangelical than Jesus' divinity with a non-Christian. I am more likely to argue about how to prioritize abortion, capital punishment, warfare, etc with someone who holds similar values on those issues but prioritizes them differently.
Now, these disagreements aren't inherently bad. There is a synodality to Christianity that is almost always preempted by disagreement. What I think is wrong, is when we presume we know the heart, mind, and intentions of those with whom we disagree. When we divide the family God has called to himself into tribes that won't talk to each other because the other side isn't genuinely interested in following God we have created a problem. This problem only grows when we not only presume upon the other person but also seek to police the Spirit. Certainly, we have a creed, practices, and other things that create natural boundaries. But a line that has always spoken to me was something along these lines: "I can tell you where the Church is, that doesn't mean I can tell you where it isn't." I can point to the Eucharist, to Baptism, etc, and tell you with absolute confidence that the Spirit is at work in those moments. But just because I can guarantee that, does not mean I am saying other denominations are devoid of the Spirit. Yet, in my desire to affirm that my way is right, I want uniformity that looks like me. Really what I should be seeking is unity through looking like Christ.
- Spencer Hargadon