Monday of the Thirteenth Week in Ordinary Time
The subtitle of today's Gospel reading is "Would-be Followers of Jesus". I can identify with this almost provocative phrase. My journey of following Jesus has had its share interruptions. At times the interruptions have been momentary and other times…well…it's been more ongoing. Reflecting on this, I realize most of my trouble is rooted squarely in fear. I'm afraid of the loss of control, the surrender, the abandonment necessary to genuinely follow Jesus. I get in my own way and make this discipleship thing so much harder than it is meant to be.
The passage from chapter 8 of Matthew’s Gospel talks about the two “would be” followers of Jesus. The first, a scribe, tells Jesus he will follow him wherever he goes. Jesus says to him, “Foxes have dens and birds of the sky have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to rest his head” and the second wishes to go first and bury his father before he sets out to follow Jesus. But Jesus says to him, “Follow me, and let the dead bury their dead” (Mt 8:22). Clearly, these would-be disciples can expect their lives will change completely; Jesus more than hints at this reality. The very human reaction to radical life changes is to hesitate, make excuses, to put it off a while.
It can be just plain scary. Fear strongly urges one to resist the invitation of Jesus. Fear prevents one from focusing on Jesus; it slips into one's thoughts and eases Love (God) out. Fear says, "You need to be in control, follow your own agenda, hold tightly to what you have, and scramble to get more. It screams: "Hold on for dear life!". Love, on the other hand, says, "God is in control, God has a precious plan for you, and God will provide everything you need. Love says: Let go, dear one. Surrender to my love.".
God never tires of seeking would-be disciples and God's patience never wears thin. God understands human resistance to complete and utter abandonment to Love. Still the choice remains with us. On this day, will the choice be fear or Love? By the grace of God, may it be the latter.
--Gail Lyman