Friday of the Twenty-first Week in Ordinary Time
When I first read today's gospel (Matthew 25:1-13), I thought, oh, here's just a parable about why procrastination is bad. It shows us that we've got to keep constantly on top of things, or else we'll miss the important stuff. Those bridesmaids who didn't have enough oil lost out because they hadn't been keeping up with what they had to do. That's what I've often heard in homilies when this passage is preached.
That kind of reading of the gospel feels exhausting, though. That's because my life is so busy that procrastination isn't the issue for me. Rather, stuff doesn't get done precisely because I'm trying to get other stuff done. When I'm staring at a sink full of dirty dishes, or a pile of papers that need to be graded, I'm always also aware of all the other good things I should also do: playing with my kids, meeting with students, catching up on bills and so on.
What if those bridesmaids didn't have oil because they were caring for sick parents, or helping friends through hard times?
Then I realized that I hadn't quite read the gospel fully the first time through. "Keep awake," Jesus proclaims. He does NOT say: "Do it all and don't drop any of the balls in the air." Participation in the kingdom of heaven is less about "doing it all" than it is about being aware of one's surroundings, and especially of the people that are in your life.
That should be good news for us busy people - though being aware isn't necessarily easier either. But "being awake" and aware does mean we learn to sift through our priorities. Most especially, we learn how to pare down or push aside those activities that aren't directly helping us participate in God's heavenly kingdom.
"Keep awake" by being aware is also present in today's first passage (1 Thessalonians 4:1-8). Paul exhorts the people to conduct themselves in ways that are pleasing to God. Even more than that, they are to take what they've learned from Paul and try to surpass it. Paul gives the specific example of not marrying for lust, and not having sex simply because it feels good (in some places in those days, having sex meant you would HAVE to get married. It was a relatively quick way of ensuring a "relationship")
Paul's reasons for advising against lustful marriage are not the kinds of reasons people might articulate today for why Christians don't have premarital sex. His main reason is that it hurts other people, and therefore it hurts God. It is destructive of relationships because sex can be used in all kinds of selfish ways that get only one person the thing that they want.
In Paul's letter "keeping awake" means being very aware of how your actions affect others, and attempting to live as lovingly as possible. That kind of awareness of others' needs, rather than our own, is what I think Jesus means when he says that the bridesmaids are like the Kingdom of Heaven.
So - if there's a pile of dirty dishes in the sink, but my kids are clearly also in need of some "mommy time" I'm going to procrastinate away! This week, in the midst of the busyness of ordinary time, let us keep awake and aware of the people in our lives and what they need from us. Let us keep enough oil for them!
- Jana M. Bennett