Memorial of Saint Mary Magdalene
I think conversion happens over a lifetime - each day we are converting ourselves to the will and steadfast love of God. But there are watershed moments, too, times when things change pretty dramatically. One of those watershed moments for me was the very first time I ever made a retreat. A friend invited me to go because she knew I'd been pretty heavily thinking about atheism. So off I went to a Carmelite monastery in the middle of the desert. I stayed two weeks by myself in a small hermitage with no running water or electricity, surrounded by wild animals and tall mountains. All of this served to heighten the fact that I was alone, and scared to be alone. All of that vast space and dangerous wildness made it a great place to face that fear inside me - that God didn't really exist and that all was emptiness. In the midst of these vast mountains and wildness, I saw how utterly unlike us God is. My near-atheist view of who I thought God was, was merely a large picture of humans. But over those two weeks, I came to see that that view does not begin to measure up to who God is. Two weeks is just about enough time to make peace with being alone - and to recognize that truly we are never alone.
Of course, this watershed moment changed me. I had a purpose because I knew God. All of a sudden I found myself jetting down a path toward becoming Catholic, and going on to study theology.
The moments we read about in today's scriptures are likewise watershed moments. In the past week, we have read about the main event in Israelite history: God saves them from slavery in Egypt and then remains with them as they wander in the desert. Like me in my own desert, they too, questioned who God was (and consequently who they were). But in today's reading (Exodus 20:1-17) we see two important things: God clearly identifies himself to them, and God gives them a purpose as God's chosen people. Often when we read the Ten Commandments, we begin with "You shall have no other gods before me." But it is always important to remember the first line God includes in the commandments: I, the LORD, am your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, that place of slavery." It is only because of this that the people are called to follow God's commandments, to have no other gods and to make no graven images, and so on. God chooses the Israelites to live in a particular way.
It is interesting to compare this to today's gospel reading (John 20:1-2, 11-18). Mary Magdalene sees Jesus and proclaims him as the Lord. This is important because Moses did not see the Lord; to see the Lord was idolatrous and against the commandments. But Mary does, precisely because God has done the impossible thing of becoming human. So now we can see images of God. This too, is a watershed moment and it changes Mary and the apostles. They see the Lord; God identifies himself as the one who becomes human and loves us enough even to die and rise again. This moment gives Mary purpose - she becomes the first person to proclaim Jesus' resurrection from the dead. She becomes a witness to God's love for us.
On today's memorial for Saint Mary Magdalene, we too are called to our purpose as Christians, to witness to God's love in and for the world.
- Jana M Bennett