Thursday of the First Week of Lent
In the dramatic first reading for today, Esther along with her handmaids pray, even plead, to the LORD. Her situation, and all of Israel’s in exile is desperate. They are living under a foreign king, and one of the members of the king’s royal court has asked for their deaths. Esther and her companions hence do that which is in keeping with their formation as Jews: they fast, they don sackcloth and ashes (signs of repentance), and they beseech the LORD to rescue them. Esther’s actions here are a beautiful testimony to her loyal faith in the God of Israel. Certainly, what Esther asks of God is a big request; she asks to be saved, to have her mourning turned into gladness, her sorrow into wholeness.
The gospel passage confirms that Esther’s actions. Jesus tells his disciples to ask, to seek, to knock and we will receive, find, and have doors opened to us. Do we really believe this? Or, likewise, do we live as though we really believe this? Imagine what it means if Jesus’ words are true. Our petitions will be answered, that for which we seek we will find, we can go where we want to go. But of course, we all have our disappointments. We remember those things we asked for from God but never received. We remember the things we sought and never found. We remember the extended knocking that never opened a door.
Given these disappointments, how do we live in a more Esther-like way, following Jesus’ commands? First, we must continue to petition God, to communicate what it is that we want. Secondly – and this is the hard part – we must be extremely, extremely, extremely patient in waiting for a response. God’s time is often not our time. Lastly, we must be open to the possibility that God knows what is best for us. We may not receive, find or have a door opened to us in the way that we expected. And yet… it may still be an answer from God.
Today we celebrate the great St. Patrick, a 4th century bishop in Ireland. His life is an example of God’s grace working in unexpected ways. Taken as a slave to Ireland as a boy, Patrick prayed daily during his shepherding work that he could return to his parents. And eventually he did make his way back home. But then, upon further reflection, Patrick realized that God was calling him back to Ireland, to evangelize to all who had no knowledge of Christ. Ireland is greatly indebted to the work of their great bishop Patrick, and those of us who have Irish ancestors must also be grateful to him. But would Patrick have ever suspected that God would answer his prayers to leave Ireland only to have him return there to spend the rest of his life?
In this season of Lent, let us work consciously to form our lives to be like that of Esther and Patrick, that in times of distress we immediately turn to God, bringing our cares and troubles to him. The more we are open to receiving God’s grace in this formative process, the more likely it is that we will know what to ask for…and know when we receive it!
Maria Morrow